Many things in life are unpredictable. Sometimes things happen beyond our control. We may not want to think about them happening. We hope and pray that it never happens to us. However there comes a time when we must face this question. Either before it occurs or after when we are shocked by the reality of it.
We do not live forever here on this earth, nor can we predict who will go first or when.
I have known many who have lost their lifelong partner. I have friends younger and older who have faced this difficult situation. Each one grieves in different ways.
Our mortality is a hard subject to discuss. However it is important.
What would I do if something were to happen to my husband? Where would I go? How would I support my family? What would my husband do if I were the one to go first? My heart aches to even consider those possibilities.
A friend of mine who lives in Sweden, Lotta Wanner, wrote a very thought provoking post called “Not Enough Time“. In it she shares a couple of incidents that made her realize how short life is. She also talks about ways to prepare for our families ahead of time if something should happen to us.
If we were to have something happen to us what would we want our family to know? I wrote about this last June in my blog post “If I Only Had One Day Left“. In that post I talk about what I would do if I had only one day left to live. In that one day I would write everything I would want my children and their future generations to know.
Maybe this post will be the jumping off point to help you and your spouse discuss what you will do if something were to happen to either of you.
Some questions you might consider discussing are:
- How will you support the family?
- Where will you live?
- What decisions would be hard to make while mourning?
- Do you both know where important documents are kept?
- What about passwords to personal accounts like email and such?
Those are just a few questions you might consider.
Don’t get me wrong it is very good to plan for a long and healthy life. It is also good to prepare for your future and what you want to accomplish in your later years. Dream big dreams of happily-ever-after together.
God doesn’t want us to worry about losing the ones we love. If you think about it having this discussion and preparing beforehand actually frees us to not have to worry about it anymore. When those important matters are taken care of we are free to live and dream of a long and healthy future together without fear of what may come.
The day may come that you face life without your spouse. Whether you are prepared or not it will still be hard. Or perhaps you are already facing that moment.
Here are some words of comfort I want to give you today.
“Brothers and sisters, we do not want you to be uninformed about those who sleep in death, so that you do not grieve like the rest of mankind, who have no hope.
For we believe that Jesus died and rose again, and so we believe that God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in him.
According to the Lord’s word, we tell you that we who are still alive, who are left until the coming of the Lord, will certainly not precede those who have fallen asleep.
For the Lord himself will come down from heaven, with a loud command, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet call of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first.
After that, we who are still alive and are left will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. And so we will be with the Lord forever.
Therefore encourage one another with these words.”
– 1 Thessalonians 4:13-18 NIV
This is hope. Knowing that even though the loss hurts right now, a day will come when we will see our beloved ones again. Oh what a glorious day that will be!
Will you be having this discussion with your spouse? Are you prepared? Please share with us in the comments.
This is Day 25 of 31 Days Building Commitment. This series is following my book Don’t Quit: Build a Legacy of Commitment which you can download for free here.
My next post will be for the lonely. Thanks for following!
~♥~ Anastacia ~♥~
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As we get older, this is something that my husband and I often talk about. He lost his father at a young age, his mother died of cancer. I’m thankful my husband has taken good care of himself, but statistics say women outlive their spouses.
It’s wise to get things in order as you mentioned. Trying to take care of business in the midst of grief can be stressful and often overwhelming.
Even though we know the Lord will meet our needs, it’s only human to wonder how we’ll make it. Being prepared ahead of time is a smart move.
Shelley recently posted…Push Reset
That is so true, Shelley. This was one of the hardest posts to write because it is a topic not many of us want to think about much less discuss openly with our spouse. I am glad that you have good communication with your husband and that you take care of yourselves.
Anastacia Maness recently posted…Never Alone: Facing Life Without Your Partner