This is a guest post by my dad, Paul Clark. He and my mom have been happily married 40 years and raised 3 children. All 3 of whom are very committed to our spouses and our families.
It has been well said that when it comes to providing the farmer his breakfast, the cow and the hen are involved but the pig is committed. The cow can stop giving milk and the hen can stop laying eggs but for the pig there is no turning back. Commitment should be viewed just this way.
Once you jump off a cliff you are committed. There is no turning back and no changing your mind. At the point one jumps, at the point one says “I do” there is no turning back. That is true commitment. When the wedding vows say “for better or for worse, through good times and bad, until death do us part,” they mean just that.
Once the vows have been made and the commitment is underway thoughts of going back, giving up, turning around should never enter one’s mind. One has jumped and it is too late to turn back they are now committed. If divorce comes, then commitment or at the least bilateral commitment never existed.
One can react to this impossibility of going back or stopping that to which they have committed, in different ways. One can be motivated by nobility and integrity to get them through the bad times and thus praise their own strength of character and enlist the same praise from others to comfort them in their misery. One may be motivated by stubbornness to maintain their commitment.
However, there is a better way. That way is love. Love makes true commitment possible. When turning back is not an option, when the vows have been made and reneging on them is not a possibility then solving problems and coping with troubles that arise in marriage and family life are left with but one tool and that is love.
The Bible teaches us that
“Love is kind and patient, never jealous, boastful, proud, or rude. Love isn’t selfish or quick tempered. It doesn’t keep a record of wrongs that others do. Love rejoices in the truth, but not in evil. Love is always supportive, loyal, hopeful, and trusting. Love never fails!”
– 1 Corinthians 13:1-7 CEV
When a man and a woman truly love each other, true commitment will exist. Its proof is found in duration. Love and true commitment will weather every storm, EVERY storm!
Is it possible for a couple to be married for forty years and never once consider divorce or separation? This author will testify that it is indeed! True love and commitment causes a couple to stay together and causes them to be unable to envision , imagine, contemplate, or in any way desire life apart.
There is another commitment that helps with the marriage commitment. If the man and the woman will each commit themselves to God first and put God first in their lives then as they both strive to be pleasing to God they will discover that they will be pleasing to each other. True commitment to God makes commitment to marriage and family very achievable.
So how about you? Are you committed? Will you be the Chicken, the Cow, or the Pig in your marriage? Feel free to share in the comments.
Paul Clark, the pastor of Walnut Street Baptist Church in Hillsboro, Tx., has a Doctorates Degree in Theology from Texas Baptist Institute-Seminary. He and his beloved wife, Janie have been married 40 years come December. You can find out more about Bro. Paul and connect with him on his website at http://baptistville.org. You can also subscribe to his YouTube Channel here.
This is Day 5 of 31 Days Building Commitment. Check back tomorrow to see how a single person can prepare for their future marriage.Like